Sex Therapy in San Diego and Online Across California

Sexuality is a fundamental part of well-being, connection, and a fulfilling life, but it’s also one of the most difficult areas to talk about.

As an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, my approach to sex therapy is supportive, direct, sex-positive, and focused on helping individuals and couples create more authentic, connected, and fulfilling intimate lives.

I offer in-person sex therapy in San Diego and virtual sex therapy throughout California.

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You May Be Feeling…

You may feel disconnected from yourself, your partner, or your sense of intimacy.

Perhaps conversations about sex feel difficult, vulnerable, frustrating, or avoided altogether. Maybe intimacy has become stressful, distant, confusing, or emotionally charged. Or maybe you simply want a more connected, fulfilling, and authentic relationship with your sexuality and relationships.

Sex therapy offers a supportive, non-judgmental space to better understand these experiences and create meaningful change.

  • Emotional or physical disconnection

  • Desire differences or low intimacy

  • Anxiety, shame, or frustration around sexuality

  • Rebuilding trust after betrayal or infidelity

  • Sexual compulsivity or unwanted patterns

  • Wanting deeper connection, pleasure, and fulfillment

Sex therapy offers a supportive, sex-positive, and non-judgmental space to better understand these experiences and create meaningful change.

My Approach to Sex Therapy

Sexuality is deeply connected to embodiment, emotion, identity, relationship, meaning, and vitality. When sexuality becomes disconnected, compulsive, conflictual, painful, or absent, it can affect confidence, closeness, self-expression, and overall life satisfaction.

As an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, I bring specialized training and experience in helping individuals and couples navigate the complex emotional, relational, and physical dimensions of sexuality.

My approach to sex therapy is sex-positive, direct, supportive, and non-judgmental. I work with individuals and couples to better understand the emotional, relational, physical, psychological, and bodily patterns shaping their sexual experience.

I draw from sex therapy, somatic psychotherapy, existential-humanistic psychotherapy, positive psychology, and practical solution-focused work. This means we may explore what happens in your body, how you communicate about desire, what intimacy means to you, what patterns keep repeating, and what kind of sexual life or relationship you want to create.

The goal is not to force sexuality into a narrow definition of “normal.” The goal is to help you develop a relationship with sexuality that feels authentic, connected, pleasurable, meaningful, and aligned with your values.

What Clients Have Said

"It was one of the only therapeutic relationships where I felt I could be truly honest for the first time without fear of judgment. We worked together through assumptions and beliefs I held about myself, accepting aspects of my personality I felt would be shameful if others knew about them."

  • JM

Common Reasons Individuals and Couples Seek Sex Therapy

Sexual concerns are often shaped by the interaction of body, emotion, relationship, history, stress, health, identity, and meaning. This work is not about blame or shame. It is about understanding what is happening and creating a more satisfying and connected intimate life.

Intimacy & Connection

  • Sexless or low-intimacy relationships

  • Desire differences

  • Emotional or physical disconnection

  • Difficulty talking about needs

  • Rebuilding closeness

Growth, Fulfillment & Positive Sexuality

  • Deeper emotional and physical connection

  • Greater confidence and self-awareness

  • Healthier relationship patterns

  • A more fulfilling and aligned intimate life

Sexual Compulsivity, Shame & Identity

  • Sexual compulsivity

  • Unwanted sexual behaviors

  • Shame related to sexuality or desire

  • Exploring identity, desires, or relationship structures

Infidelity & Relationship Repair

  • Recovering from betrayal or infidelity

  • Rebuilding trust

  • Restoring emotional and sexual connection

  • Understanding patterns that create distance

Sexual Performance & Confidence

  • Performance anxiety

  • Erectile difficulties

  • Premature ejaculation

  • Self-consciousness during intimacy

  • Health issues, aging, or medical conditions affecting sexuality

Therapy can help you move toward greater connection, authenticity, intimacy, pleasure, and fulfillment, both emotionally and physically.

Creating a More Connected and Fulfilling Intimate Life

Sex therapy can be practical, emotional, relational, embodied, and deeply personal. While therapy may involve concrete strategies and solutions when needed, it also creates space for deeper awareness, more honest communication, and a fuller relationship with sexuality and intimacy.

This work can help you better understand your body, emotional responses, relationship patterns, desires, boundaries, fears, and needs. It can support more open conversations around intimacy, greater emotional and sexual connection, and healthier, more intentional choices in relationships and sexuality.

The larger goal is not simply reducing problems. It is developing a relationship with sexuality, intimacy, and connection that feels more authentic, pleasurable, meaningful, and aligned with who you are and how you want to live.

Sex Therapy FAQ

  • My work integrates sex therapy, somatic psychotherapy, existential-humanistic psychotherapy, positive psychology, and practical solution-focused work. Rather than focusing only on sexual symptoms, we look at the whole person: body, emotion, relationship, identity, meaning, and the kind of intimate life you want to create.

  • Yes. I believe sexuality is an important part of connection, vitality, authenticity, pleasure, and overall well-being. My role is not to judge your desires, identity, relationship structure, or sexual concerns, but to help you explore them thoughtfully and develop a relationship with sexuality that feels healthy, intentional, connected, and fulfilling for you.

  • Sexuality is not only mental or physical. It also involves the body, emotions, nervous system, history, relationships, identity, and self-perception. Somatic psychotherapy helps us notice how tension, anxiety, shame, emotional protection, pleasure, or desire may show up physically and relationally, creating opportunities for deeper awareness, connection, and change.

  • Yes. Many individuals and couples seek sex therapy because intimacy has decreased, become difficult, or stopped entirely. Rather than approaching this through blame or judgment, we work to understand the emotional, relational, physical, and communication patterns contributing to disconnection and help create pathways toward greater intimacy, pleasure, and fulfillment.

  • Yes. Infidelity and affairs can bring up profound pain, confusion, anger, shame, grief, loneliness, disconnection, and uncertainty for everyone involved.

    I work with couples trying to rebuild trust and understanding, individuals processing betrayal, and individuals trying to understand the choices, patterns, needs, or disconnection that contributed to the affair.

    Therapy can provide a space to explore what happened with honesty and compassion, improve communication, better understand relational dynamics, and clarify what each person wants moving forward.

  • My approach to sexual compulsivity is direct, compassionate, and non-shaming. Rather than reducing the work to simple behavioral control, we explore the emotional, relational, psychological, and bodily patterns connected to the behavior while developing healthier and more intentional ways of relating to sexuality, intimacy, stress, and emotional needs.

  • Yes. I work with LGBTQ+ individuals and couples in a supportive, affirming, and non-judgmental way. My approach is not based on assumptions about sexuality, gender, identity, or relationship structure. The focus is on helping you create relationships, intimacy, and a life that feel authentic, connected, and aligned with who you are.

  • Yes. Physical health issues, chronic illness, disability, aging, medication effects, pain, stress, and changes in the body can all affect sexuality and intimacy. Therapy can help individuals and couples navigate these changes with greater communication, adaptability, emotional connection, self-understanding, and compassion while continuing to cultivate intimacy, pleasure, and fulfillment.

  • Yes. I work with people in many different kinds of relationship structures, including consensual non-monogamy, polyamorous relationships, open relationships, and other non-traditional dynamics. My role is not to impose a particular model of relationship, but to help you better understand communication, boundaries, intimacy, emotional needs, sexuality, and the kind of relationship structure that feels most authentic and sustainable for you.

  • Yes. I work with people in many different kinds of relationship structures, including consensual non-monogamy, polyamorous relationships, open relationships, and other non-traditional dynamics. My role is not to impose a particular model of relationship, but to help you better understand communication, boundaries, intimacy, emotional needs, sexuality, and the kind of relationship structure that feels most authentic and sustainable for you.

  • Yes. I offer sex therapy in person in San Diego and online throughout California using a secure and confidential platform.

Let’s talk about how you can create a more authentic and fulfilling intimate life.

Sex therapy with Hayden Dover is available in person in San Diego and online throughout California.

Schedule a Consultation